Author Topic: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.  (Read 540 times)

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NorCalChuck

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I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« on: May 01, 2017, 12:22:26 PM »
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Circumference.  He acquired his size from too much pi.

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
« Last Edit: May 01, 2017, 01:31:59 PM by M1911A1 »
"We will have a good government as long as those that govern are effected by those laws that they pass. When those that are passing the laws are no longer effected by those laws then they will no longer pass good laws."

M1911A1

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Re: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« Reply #1 on: May 01, 2017, 01:34:44 PM »
Sorry, Chuck...
I didn't really edit your post, but rather I hit the wrong "button."
I apologize.

I meant to reply with:
Not "Sir Circumference," but rather "Sir Cumference."
Steve,
retired leathersmith and practical shooter


"Qui desiderat pacem, pręparet bellum."

NorCalChuck

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Re: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2017, 05:09:39 PM »
HA HAA . . . Yea have seen that one before.
Darn heck . . . . I will have to try some more than.

Try these.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

Two silkworms had a race.  They ended up in a tie.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.  The police are looking into it.
"We will have a good government as long as those that govern are effected by those laws that they pass. When those that are passing the laws are no longer effected by those laws then they will no longer pass good laws."

M1911A1

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Re: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« Reply #3 on: May 01, 2017, 06:15:46 PM »
Help!
It's getting worse!
 ;D    ;)
Steve,
retired leathersmith and practical shooter


"Qui desiderat pacem, pręparet bellum."

NorCalChuck

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Re: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« Reply #4 on: May 05, 2017, 10:47:54 AM »
OK . . . . Ok . . . . . Try this one:
Famed composer Johann Strauss was an avid mountain climber who once waltzed himself into deep trouble. He lost his footing and found himself hanging by his fingertips over a bottomless gorge.

Another climber heroically came to his rescue and just managed to grab Johann by a strap of his backpack to save the Maestro's life.

Since then, the act of trying to get out of a seemingly hopeless situation has come to be known as grasping at Strauss.

That is of course if you can call it a PUN . . . . with an explanation.
"We will have a good government as long as those that govern are effected by those laws that they pass. When those that are passing the laws are no longer effected by those laws then they will no longer pass good laws."

M1911A1

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Re: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« Reply #5 on: May 05, 2017, 01:26:00 PM »
Chuck, you take all the pun out of life!

Have I posted this before?
I've a didgeridoo but it didn't.
It's made out of wood but it wouldn't.
So I travelled to Oz
Just to find out the cause,
And was told it was cold so it couldn't.
Steve,
retired leathersmith and practical shooter


"Qui desiderat pacem, pręparet bellum."

oldranger53

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Re: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« Reply #6 on: May 05, 2017, 09:06:04 PM »
Chuck, you take all the pun out of life!

Have I posted this before?
I've a didgeridoo but it didn't.
It's made out of wood but it wouldn't.
So I travelled to Oz
Just to find out the cause,
And was told it was cold so it couldn't.

!!!!!great!!!!!

Stand Tall, Speak Truth, Never Surrender

Never shall I fail my comrades. I will always keep myself mentally alert, physically strong and morally straight, and I will shoulder more than my share of the task whatever it may be.  One hundred percent and then some.

NorCalChuck

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Re: I think we are in need of a new PUN list.
« Reply #7 on: May 07, 2017, 01:37:31 PM »
AH-H-H-h-h-hhhhhh! . . . . Shucks!
"We will have a good government as long as those that govern are effected by those laws that they pass. When those that are passing the laws are no longer effected by those laws then they will no longer pass good laws."